I went to the psychiatrist yesterday.
My anxiety attacks are affecting my well-being and my way of living.
It’s just like 2005 all over again.
This started last week when Anika and I got sick at the same time. The ER doctor gave me Co-Amoxiclav as an antibiotic for my tonsillitis. I had to drink it 3x a day for 7 days. Napaka-tapang nun. My stomach started acting up. I vomited and vomited and kept on having LBM until I got so weak. That plus the stress that Anika has pneumonia triggered this anxiety attack.
Grabe mga bakla ang nararamdaman ko now. I feel very uneasy. I feel panicky. Natatakot ako ng walang dahilan. I can’t stay still. I can’t sleep. I cannot concentrate. It’s very, very difficult.
That is why I asked Alvin to take me na to a specialist.
It told him about my history. I told him about the recent week. He told me that this anxiety may be just symptoms of what happened. He cannot conclude yet if I have an anxiety disorder because napaka-recent ko lang daw siya na-feel ulit.
He gave me two kinds of medicines. One medicine for anxiety. 1/8th lang ng pill ang need ko i-take every morning and night. He gave me also another medicine so I can sleep better. Half tablet naman yun. Balik daw ako sa kanya next week.
Honestly, I haven’t taken those medicines yet. I have another fear of depending ko it. Gusto ko gumaling ng normal sana. However, the doctor said naman that they are trained how to give these medicines and manage it so that hindi ako magdedepend doon.
I’m thinking now if I’m going to take it na. Para kako magcomfortable yung nararamdaman ko.
Pero I know, I have to fix my stomach. It needs to get well. Grabe my acid reflux. It’s really painful and uncomfortable. Nakakadagdag talaga siya sa anxiety ko. I’m thinking, ma-solve lang itong tiyan ko, I think I will get out of these anxiety attacks.
I’ve been going to church more often now too. Dasal ako ng dasal. Lagi kong kinakausap si God na tulungan niya sana ako malagpasan ito.
I am lucky that Alvin is very supportive. Not all people can understand this. Hindi sila open minded about mental illnesses. Akala nila wala lang and it’s something that you can “just get over with”. Malupit yung iba. Akala nila arte lang. I wish there’s more awareness for mental health in our country. Madaming matutulungan na nagsusuffer na mga tao. It’s not easy to have this. You will not even wish this for your enemy. Maganda sana if people around you understands you because they are aware of this.
Anyway, I have to go ha? Please keep me also in your prayers as I fight this. Hindi ako magpapatalo dito, that’s for sure. Thank you ng madami…