I like to think that one of my life purposes (apart from ientertain kayo through this blog) is to share my nice finds.
Check out this ADORN (@adorn_ph in Instagram) top. It was sent to me so I can try it out so I wore it during Baby Ellie’s birthday party last week.
It fits so nice. I noticed na pwede ito sa buntis because of the garter design sa harap. ADORN_PH also has tops which are nursing friendly. Bakit ba wala pang mga ganito ganito nung buntis ako kay Anika 8 years ago!
Anyway, yesterday, I asked in my IG what topics you’d want me to write about. One of my dear blog readers commented na magsulat daw ako about how I juggle everything at the same time.
Sige, I shall share about that now. Tamang tama because after having this anxiety condition, nagbago ng slight ang outlook ko in life therefore affecting how I think, manage and attack my day to day activities. But first, lemme show you how my typical day goes nowadays.
4:50 am – I wake up and drink a glass of water. I go to Anika’s room and wake her up. I am very consistent with this. Ako ang gumigising kay Anika every single day when she has school. When she’s awake na, we will embrace for like a minute or two on the bed. While doing that, I marvel on the feeling of having a daughter. Ninanamnam ko yung moment na yun, holding her every single day. And then I bring her to the bathroom tapos she will take a bath on her own.
If it’s a day na morning exercise day ko, I will change na into gym clothes. I will check ano baon ni Anika. I no longer make her baon since I had this anxiety condition. I don’t know why. Si yaya na lang ni Anika ang gumagawa and I just check. Hopefully next school year okay na ako ulit. Then I will kiss Anika. Then I will go to the sleeping Alvin and wake him up tapos ieembrace ko din siya. Then I go to my office to exercise before I start my day.
Pero if it’s a normal day, while Anika is taking a bath, I will go to our altar and read the bible verses that my dad told me to read daily. Tamang tama, when I’m done, Anika’s done in the bathroom too and I make ligo na.
After getting ready (Anika eats breakfast while her yaya does her hair), I bring her to school. School bus naman siya if I don’t bring her. We talk on the way to school or we do car-reoke. Haha! Mahilig kami ni Anika magkwentuhan and kumanta. When we arrive in school, we pass by the chapel for a short time, mga 3-5 minutes so she can pray. And then sasamahan ko siya sa school until papasukin na sila sa gates to their classrooms. I watch her until she disappears from my view going to her classroom.
After that, I either go to the Magallanes church or to Santuario de San Antonio church to pray. One thing that this anxiety disorder has made me is to be (a lot) more prayerful. After praying, I buy breakfast then go to the office.
I usually arrive before 730 am sa office or sa project site so I do my hair and make up sa car.
8:00 am – I start my work day.
12 noon – If feel ko, I blog.
6:00 pm – I go boxing. If I don’t go boxing, I either meet up with Pineda (which sadly hindi ganun ka-often, mga once every 2 weeks) or I go home na after I pass by the Adoration chapel. Minsan naloloka din ako kasi hindi naman ako ganito na pala-dasal dati. Pero I find comfort and relief pagnasa simbahan ako eh. It’s my time to reflect and meditate.
8:00 pm – I arrive home. Tapos na si Anika magtutor by this time so I have dinner na with them. After dinner, we’d watch TV together. Minsan may kanya kanyang gawa pero nasa same area lang kami usually sa house.
Sometimes, like once or twice a week, Janis, Mark and Alfred (Alvin’s bff) come over and stay until 11pm.
9 to 9:30 pm – I go with Anika when she washes up for bedtime. I tuck her to bed. I do this everyday. As much as possible, may chikahan kami before she sleeps. I ask how her day was. Nagkukuwentuhan lang kami until antukin siya.
When she’s sleeping, if we do not have our friends over, I either blog or watch TV with Alvin. If Alvin’s doing something else like nagmomoment siya sa lanai with his beer and guitar, nag-bablog ako. If he’s watching TV, tatabihan ko if I like what he’s watching.
Around 10:30 or 11 pm, Alvin and I go to bed na. Minsan nagkukwentuhan kami before sleeping pero sometimes we just fall asleep na. Pero I cannot sleep without like hugging his arm or something. Kailangan nakadikit ako sa kanya.
Oh wait, I forgot to mention that nowadays, Alvin calls me everyday on his way to his office. Yun naman yung time namin magkwentuhan. Minsan short lang, minsan naman matagal na usap.
So there. I wanted you to see how my normal day goes so I can give you my tips how I balance everything.
TIP #1: You need help. Hindi mo kakayanin magisa everything. You need a trustworthy and efficient na kasambahay. I trained mine well so automatic na ang lahat sa house. Cooking, laba, household chores, alam na nila paano and kelan gagawin. Next, you need a tutor. Alvin and I decided to get Anika a tutor to lessen the stress. Pero kanya kanyang trip naman yan. If you want to be the one to teach your kids, gorabelles. Ako kasi hindi ko na kaya because even if I don’t go boxing after work, I am mentally exhausted already at the end of the day and that is not masama. We are human beings and napapagod din. Checking na lang ako kay Anika and pa-review review ng konti. Next, Alvin helps me. He fills in sa mga to do the bahay so hindi lahat ako. Minsan wala na pa lang ulam, he buys konti then ako na bibili the next day ng bongga. Lastly, I have an incredible staff at work. I was also able to train them well (for me ha but it’s a continuous process kasi always may room for improvement). We, as a group, are able to deliver ng maayos because they know what to do and what are expected of them.
TIP #2: I have so many to-do lists. My to-do list ako for work, for the house, for the blog, for the shopping and for the things I need to think about.
TIP #3: Prioritize. Isama mo na din yan sa mga listahang gagawin mo. Ang priority ko is si Anika and Alvin. If they need me, I drop work or I don’t exercise or I don’t see my friends or I don’t blog. Sabi nga nila diba, you can only able to do 3 out of these 5 things: work, family, friends, exercise and sleep. Sa awa naman ng Diyos, I am able to do all because I prioritize. Family comes first in everything. The rest will follow. Like sa friends, you do not need to be with them everyday. Set time for them. Kaya I am grateful ang konti lang ng kaibigan ko eh. Konti lang sila pero mga totoo naman. I am also grateful that we live near each other so madali magmeet up even if once a week lang. And ayun pala, ginagawan ko ng paraan everything. Like for friends, I tell them to bring their kids in our house para we can spend time. Exercise, hindi kailangan sa gym. If I don’t have time to go to the gym or boxing, I do leg raises and sit ups while watching TV. If gusto, may paraan. If ayaw, madaming dahilan. Tandaan niyo yan.
TIP #5: DO NOT STRESS OVER EVERYTHING. Before I told you na lahat ng ito ay nagagawa ko pero nakakasira ng bait. Pre-anxiety disorder, hardcore ako. I didn’t allow myself to leave room for mistakes. Gusto ko accomplished ko lahat well. I didn’t settle. I expected so much from myself and I beat myself up if I couldn’t keep up with my expectations. Taranta ako everyday kasi I wanated to accomplish everything. Dapat ako nagtututor kay Anika. Dapat todo exercise para sexy. Dapat maganda ang design lagi ng baon ni Anika. Dapat hindi nawawalan ng grocery sa bahay. Dapat walang mali sa work. Dapat mapuntahan ko lahat ng project sites. Dapat may spend time kaming tatlo nina Anika and Alvin sa labas. Dapat si Anika dalhin sa dance lessons, gymnastics lessons and kung ano ano pa. In short, nagpakaloka loka ako thinking ako ang reincarnation ni Darna. Ayan, na-trigger ang anxiety disorder ko. My anxiety disorder may have stemmed from my childhood days pero ang ka-toxican ko now and the way I think, triggered it again.
TIP #6: Accept to let go of some things like facials, manicure pedicure, shopping and waxing. Wag niyo na din istress yan. Isingit niyo na lang if may time.
TIP #7: Lastly, mga bakla, do not compare yourselves to other moms. Yes they may look like they have everything under control: perfect homes, yung nails nila perfect, fresh sila lagi, yung grades ng mga anak nila ang tataas and mukhang ang saya saya nila sa life. Don’t compare. Magaling lang ang mga yan magdala. That or they have plenty of help too. Di ba nga, all moms are the same. Lahat tayo nahihirapan. May mga moms lang na magaling magproject and magdala and I commend them for that. So don’t feel bad if you come across these kind of moms. Wag lang sila mang-mamata bakit mukhang ilang araw ka na hindi naliligo, ibang usapan na yan. Pero believe me, based on experience and with my chikas with other moms, lahat tayo struggling.
Ayun, I hope I was able to help you somehow. I am not saying it is easy doing everything. To you, I may seem to be doing and accomplishing a lot of things: good career, maayos si Anika, maayos ang bahay, nakaka-pagexercise, may mga friends… but like you, I struggle. I have plenty of help and I prioritize kaya nakakaya ko somehow. Pero madami akong mistakes. Ask Alvin or ask my friends about it. Although I post some of my engot moments in social media, madami pa na ganun ang nangyayari na hindi ko na naku-kwento. No mom is perfect but walang pwedeng magsabi na hindi ka mabuting Nanay.