I have to get something off my chest.
You know that when I blog, it actually makes me think so please bear with me.
Nagiisip ako if I should keep blogging or stop altogether na.
One of my blogging idols, Chuvaness, has stopped posting blog entries for quite some time already. Napaisip tuloy ako bakit hindi na siya nagbablog. As you have noticed, dati I was blogging very frequently. Minsan twice or thrice a day pa ang mga blog entries. Ngayon, padalang ng padalang na.
Hindi ko alam if nawawalan na ako ng gana or maybe because I got sick lang of this anxiety disorder or hindi ko na alam if may sense pa ako in this blogging world. Napakadami na kasing nagsulputang blogs out there. As in madaming madami especially celebrities. Iniisip ko if nakakasabay pa ba ako. May relevance pa ba tong mga pinagsusulat ko or mga pinagkukukwento ko sa inyo? Did I lose my blogging mojo already?
I’ll have to admit, dumating yung time that I got very conscious of the numbers of hits. Bumaba siya ng di hamak last year. It affected how I saw myself as a blogger. But my friends reminded me that I never blogged because of the hits. I blogged because gusto ko magkwento ng magkwento ng kung ano ano about my life. I never blogged because of the money. However, napaka-impokrita ko naman if I’ll say wapakels ako sa income na nagegenerate ng Mommy Fleur Blog. For years nasusustain niya yung mga luho ko. Dumating yung time na nagipit kami ng bongga ni Alvin and yung income ko from blogging helped us in paying for the monthly expenses.
Pero bakit nga ba talaga ako nagbablog?
I’m blogging because as morbid as it sounds, I want Anika, Alvin, my family, friends and those who know me to have something to read about me even after I die. I don’t want them to forget me. I’m blogging because I want Anika to be able to recall how much I love and cared for her. I’m blogging because I want to have something to read about when I’m old and gray. Gusto ko mabasa yung mga kalokohan ko nung bata bata pa ako. I’m blogging kasi I know I am able to help other women out there. Kahit na ba comic relief man lang sa buhay nila ang macontribute ko, masaya na ako.
I remember blogging kasi sobra kong daldal and kaysa mga dingding and halaman ang kausapin ko, dito ko na lang kinukwento.
I need to go back siguro to those basic facts, ano?
As long as blogging makes me happy, I should continue.
What do you think?