I seldom check my Facebook wall anymore. Pati nga IG madalang na. Yes, I post but I don’t scan posts of other people and “hang around” my social media anymore.
There’s nothing wrong with people who do that but I realized looking at people’s lives and how they are everyday gives me undue anxiety. It seems harmless, di ba, pero try to observe your reactions or your feelings whenever you scan your Facebook and Instagram wall.
If wala ka naman feelings and you do it out of boredom or for entertainment, lucky you.
Ako kasi sometimes nagkakaron ako ng feelings and thoughts na:
“Ang swerte naman nito. Parang ang saya saya. Parang walang ka-proble-problema sa mundo”
“Buti pa siya, may time magvacation kasama buong family. Kelan kaya kami nina Alvin pwede magvacation together? Hindi man lang kami magkaron ng break to have a vacation. Lintek, expired na pala passport namin. I need to have them renewed para makapagvacation din.”
“Grabe si ano, may sakit. Ang bata pa niya. What if magtuloy tuloy and he/she dies? Kawawa naman family niya. He/she must be feeling so sad now. Shit. What if I get sick and die? I need to have myself checked. Parang may kumikirot nga dito sa tagiliran ko din.”
“Hindot na ‘to. Lima na ang anak pero ang sexy. She’s so lucky she has time to exercise everyday. Gusto ko din makapagexercise everyday. I wish my work schedule allows that.”
“Buntis na naman siya?! Kakapanganak lang niya with her 4th child ah! Medyo may pagka-hindi fair din ang mundo.”
“Itong babaeng ito wala na ginawa kundi maglunchout, magshopping and magtravel samantalang ako, nasa trabaho lang lagi. Kumokopya lang naman siya sa akin nung nasa school pa kami. Paano kaya nangyari yun?
“Kita mo tong taong ‘to. Ang salbahe nito sa asawa pero napakasweet pa din ng asawa niya sa kanya. Itong si Alvin pinagtimpla ko na ng kape, tinapik lang ako sa ulo.”
And so on and so forth. Of course I was just exaggerating on the last thought but you guys know what I mean.
I’m not always naman like that and please do not get me wrong. To all my friends, I am really happy for their successes and all pero alam niyo, tao lang din ako and frequently looking into their seemingly perfect lives makes me sometimes forget for a second about the good things I have in my life too.
Psychological stress ata ang tawag dun.
If you cannot understand what I’m talking about because you have never felt it, isa kayo sa mapapalad na nilalang. Magpaseminar kayo paano niyo yan nagagawa.
And now I realize, no wonder ang daming depressed na mga bata ngayon. Malamang kaka-Facebook and Instagram nila yan. Subconsciously, you compare your lives that you think are just ordinary to their peers’ (like I said kanina) seemingly perfect lives.
When you look at it, having the ability to connect with our friends through social media is good naman for our well-being because it can strengthen our social ties with them therefore could make us happy.
However, it can also lessen our self-esteem and makes us feel sad or alone because of comparison stress. Pwede din na-aabsorb mo yung stress nila through looking at their photos and reading the captions. Pansinin niyo, paggalit yung isang artista, apektadong apektado din ang madlang people. Buti if that stress or bad vibes will stop with you. Hindi. Makakalat mo din yan to your officemates, friends and even sa asawa’t anak mo.
And lastly, procrastination. Madami akong nasasayang na time whenever I’m checking my social media feed. Aminin niyo yan. Also, it takes my time away from Anika and Alvin. The time that I spend looking at photos ay nilalaro ko na lang kay Anika or chinichika ko na lang kay Alvin. Better pa.
I am not concluding that using social media is wrong. I think we can get the benefits if gamitin natin siya ng tama.
- Let’s use it to connect with our friends.
- Re-check the quality of people you follow. Dapat may natututunan tayo sa kanila. Hindi lang puros gastos. Damn those pretty online stores. Lelz. Don’t follow negatrons. They will suck the happiness out of you. You can stay friends (to be connected) in Facebook. You can just hide them from your feed. In Instagram naman, you ca mute them.
- Dapat isaksak natin sa utak natin na not everything you see in your friends photos are what they seem. Walang tao ang walang problema. Patay lang ang ganun. So if you have problems be thankful because it means you are alive and kicking. Besides, malamang, yan din ang akala ng mga friends mo sayo. They’d think ang swerte mo and wala kang ka-problem problem
- And take time to disconnect from it and be at the moment. I am continuously learning and re-learning this kasi hindi siya madali para sa taong tulad ko.
Hindi ko sinabi na hindi na ako magpopost ha? I will still post. For me may purpose kasi ako. Gusto ko makatulong to other women out there with whatever, info ba yan or magandang product that they can try. Besides, posting make me happy and yabang aside, pinagkakakitaan ko din kasi siya. I just hope to those who see my social media posts: (1) may natutunan kayo sa akin, (2) napapatawa ko kayo and (3) do not think that my life is perfect ‘coz it’s not, kung alam niyo lang.
That’s all! Mwah!