Last weekend, Alvin called me to tell me that one of our wedding godfather is sick. He’s battling with cancer and it all came super sudden lang. The worse part was grabe na daw the cancer when they discovered it. This news saddened us so much because ang bait bait talaga ng ninong namin na iyon. He’s very kind, unassuming and I always see him with a smile on his face.
Eto na naman ako sa ka-praningan ko.
As usual, I related myself to his situation. I became paranoid. You see, I dunno if I told you na this, I do not have problems with dying. As in wala talaga. Eh kung yun yung naka-tadhana sa akin eh, I cannot really do something about it. The only thing that would depress me would be leaving Alvin and Anika behind. The thought of them not having me in their future makes me really sad. If God will take me now (knock on wood), I won’t be able to be there and plan Anika 7th and 18th birthday. I won’t be able to be with her when she graduates or enter college. Yung wedding niya wala ako. Ang daming milestones that I won’t be there to witness it.
Yan ang nakakalungkot na part.
Since we do not know when we will be taken by our Creator, I have a new segment in my blog. Inspired by the dad who left letters to his 3 year old son that his son to guide him through his life after he dies, gagawa din ako niyan. If, luckily, hindi ako ma-dedo anytime soon, Anika and I can still both look back and read the different blog posts in this segment. Future reference, ika nga nila.
The title of this new segment is Dear Anika.
My First Dear Anika is When She Graduates Kindergarten.
Dear Anika,
Congratulations on your kindergarten graduation, sweetheart!
I know you did well because I saw how hard you studied during your exams. I won’t be surprised if your Tatay will go up the stage with you because you’re an Eagle Certificate Awardee. Hindi talaga ako nagugulat. Mana ka kasi sa akin ‘Nak. Hehe.
This is just a start of your amazing journey. I know you’re scared of transferring to a bigger building that Grade One kids will share with older students but as you go through those gates, just imaging me holding your hand. Ganyan naman talaga tayo every first day of school di ba? Hindi ko nga lang alam who’s holding on tighter, ikaw ba or ako. Looks like it’s me because, every year, I can see you all raring to go and start the new school year with your old and new classmates tapos ako nakahawak lang sayo. Parang ayaw pa kita i-let go because ang bilis ng panahon, I can’t catch up. It was like yesterday lang when I went with you on the first day of your toddler class.
And now, you’re going to start grade school after this summer!!! *tears*
I can totally hear your voice in my head, “Nanay! Stop being overdramatic!”
My advice to you is study hard but do not forget to enjoy and have fun. Make friends. It is during this time that you will meet your future bestfriends (if you haven’t met them yet). Do not be shy. Join lang ng join sa mga clubs. Salihan mo what interests you. I would love to see you be a Star Scout just like what I was when I was in first grade. Hindi ko lang sure if type mo but if you like, I swear to you, you will have fun talaga learning all about camping and all the things that come with it.
Osha, congratulations again sweetheart. I’m super duper proud of you!
Love,
Nanay
Hi Mommy Fleur! Such a sweet idea! Nakakita rin po ako sa Pinterest before. The idea is you start an email for your baby, send letters, pictures, whatever and give them the password on their 18th birthday! 🙂
Just like the song from Kris Allen, We gotta live like we’re dying. So we should tell everyday our loved ones or make them feel how much we love them because we never know when’ll be our time.